Humans are not solitary creatures. We are in relationship, always.
With family. With friends.
With work colleagues. With romantic partners/dates/lovers.
Do you ever ask stop and ask yourself,
“What is the quality of these relationships in my life?”
Is your relationship with your family one of openness and care?
Do you have the kind of connection you most want with your friends?
Are your work dynamics easeful?
How about your romantic life, is it as intimate as you desire?
Much of the quality of our relationships rests, fundamentally, on the skill and competency of our relating.
Relating as a verb. An action. Not something passive.
High-quality relationships and communities, of any kind, aren’t something that just fall into your lap out of the sky.
They are something you work at.
Something you practice.
ENROL IN FAR NOW
Fundamentals of Authentic Relating is a self-paced course exploring, practicing and developing the foundational aspects of the energy of intimacy - attention.
This attentional energy is broken into three categories, each with a set of specific skills to be developed.
Understanding these three different ways of using our energy, and developing the skill sets within each one, leads to an ever-increasing refinement of one's ability and capacity to create and maintain connection.
Through developing this level of skill with others, we begin setting the stage not only for harmonious and authentic relationships, yet also for something potentially much much more profound.
This course, even though it is self-paced, is actually a practice heavy, experiential dive into somewhat simple, yet infinitely deep, aspects of relating. Understanding and practicing the skills contained in this course leads to an expansion in “relational intelligence”, the awareness of and ability to shape and direct attention within human interaction.
The development of this intelligence creates possibilities of increased experiences of intimacy, ability to provide emotional support for others, clarity in expressing desires and boundaries, enhanced negotiation and conflict resolution capacities, and an expanded capacity to explore the mystery of 'other'.
Ultimately, through this practice of relating, an ever-increasing refinement of your own unique self, as well as the unique self of those around you, is enhanced.
Embedded within this approach to relating and relationship are several very powerful maps and frameworks. This training is multi-layered and has the potential to impact your experience of life in significant ways.
Attachment Theory & Interpersonal Neurobiology
- A lot of our relational issues, particularly when romance and sex is involved yet also with friends and family, stem from early attachment injuries
- Misattunement, invalidation, neglect and abuse, even by the most well-intentioned of parents, leave scars that tend to be the cause of our reactive patterns, triggers and defenses in our relationships
- By being trauma-informed and understanding the basis of what forms trauma we can actually gently and patiently heal these traumas over time through the consistent experience of caring attuned and validating attention that facilitates regulation throughout the nervous system
"Consistent regulatory experiences over time heal the nervous system.”
- Damien Bohler
- This theory, developed by modern-day philosopher and synthesist Ken Wilber, functions as a meta-theory, drawing together the majority of human discovered sciences and explorations, into one coherent framework
- Essentially it places everything in relation to everything else, allowing us to understand how it all fits together so that we may navigate this human life with more awareness
- A large part of this theory is focused on understanding adult developmental psychology, how we as adults continue to grow. This is important to recognise as through the practices in Authentic Relating we are moving towards the capacity of maintaining Integral, or mature, relationships.
"Authentic Relating when really understood is, essentially, an integral level way of interacting with other humans”
- Damien Bohler
Hi, I'm Damien Bohler
I'm the head facilitator of the work of Evolutionary Relating.
I have been facilitating and teaching groups in intersubjective and relational practices for 10 years now. I have a diverse background in a variety of fields, a curious mind and seem to be a natural teacher and facilitator.
I enjoy creating safe and transformational group containers, and imparting complex knowledge in a way that is easy to grasp.
I'm motivated to offer this work out of a love for planet earth and a deep, compelling desire to contribute to human evolution.
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